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4 You Accidentally Asserted Power Over Them The power thing.įor instance, another way you've probably earned instant hatred from someone is. That children are dicks, and they will attack you without warn- oh, wait, no. And if you think it's weird that anyone would interpret a casual everyday interaction as a power play, well, hang on to your ass, because you're about to discover something incredibly important about the world. The offended parties are assuming that you think you're so high and mighty that they don't even rate a response, and that your silence is a kind of power play intended to let them know that. For many people, you'd be better off telling them to fuck off, because at least then you're acknowledging that they matter. See, there is an old saying: Hate is not the opposite of love. "Oh, you wanted an interview, too? Sure, why don't you tell me all the ways you can go fuck yourself?" (Note: By far the angriest reaction I get to hate mail is when I don't reply at all.) That's how some people take your failure to speak to them - like you didn't even open their resume before tossing it in the trash. If you're confused, think of it this way: If you apply for a job, which is worse - a rejection letter, or no reply at all? The former is bad, but the latter is dismissive, and that's a thousand times worse. In fact, to certain personality types, not speaking is the most bitter insult possible. Now they're bitter and you're confused because, well, who would ever assume that silence is an insult? You didn't reply to their funny text with a smiley. You didn't respond to the party invitation. This is literally the most frequent social mistake I see in my day to day. "Maybe next time I'll just forget to pick up my roller skates from the stairs." Then, after you pass by this person, you hear them in the aisle behind you mutter, "Asshole." So, you run into a co-worker at the mall and think it's better to pass by in silence than do an awkward stop-and-chat that you'd probably screw up anyway. If you're an introvert, you spend so much of your time wishing that other people would just shut the hell up that you figure you're doing everyone a favor. 5 It's Not What You Said, It's What You Didn't Sayįor those of us who aren't great with people, we figure that silence is always the safest bet.